Pity and self-pity are like the crazy glue of the psyche.
Pity and self-pity take our good intentions and turn them against us in the bat of an eye. For example, it’s easy to watch someone get what they deserve on the TV or in the news. If a celebrity or politician has abused their power and betrayed their audience, we actually enjoy seeing them get crushed.
But what about those people in your own life who have taken advantage of you? Are there people around you who regularly derail you? Do those people use pity and self-pity to sabotage or slow you down? Do you let them get away with pushing your buttons in that way?
After all, you may have some very close bonds with these people. They could be part of your “tribe” or your actual birth family. They could be people you work with and feel you owe some allegiance to because of some favor they granted you way back when. But now, they’ve taken advantage of you, perhaps even betrayed you.
What do you do?
Play the Tipping Point Game
Step #1: Get Honest With Yourself
Check into your gut with this Intuitive Learning Circle™ and then see if you can find out how you react when someone is taking advantage of you:
“When I’m being taken advantage of, I _______________.”
See if you can get some more specifics.
Do I shut down and pretend nothing’s happening?
Do I swallow my resentment?
Do I excuse their behavior and look the other way?
Do I get anxious as I anticipate a confrontation?
Do I become passive-aggressive by complaining, blaming or gossiping about them to others?
Do I ever actually step in and rescue them because they just can’t handle it themselves without my help?
Step #2 Get Out of the Way
Maybe there’s something in between being mercilessly cruel and co-dependent. Maybe you can learn to use your energy differently so that you’re not feeding the bad behavior or sacrificing your own well-being.
Gaze softly at this Circle and ask:
“Have I thought of letting them have their own karma and deal with the consequences of their actions themselves?”
“Is it possible to do that?”
“Are the people in question capable of handling the consequences of their actions?”
“If not, why not?”
“If I stopped feeding the situation with my energy, would it be for the best?”
If the answer you get to the last question is “yes”, take a moment to gather up all the fear and negativity that surrounds the situation. Use the Circle with this affirmation to help you:
“I gather up the helplessness, cruelty and pain so that I can release it and let it go.”
Step #3 Clear the Mental, Emotional and Spiritual Blueprints of Pity and Self-pity
We all have family patterns and social conditioning that contribute to the tendency to get caught up in all of this business. You can use this symbol for dissolving destructive blueprints to identify them in your unconscious mind and clear them out. Just imagine the harmful patterns are like dark clouds, black snakes or old junk being carried away and consumed by the Sun.
“I don’t have to carry this anymore.”
“I can dissolve the pattern of feeding co-dependence, pity and self-pity by sending it all to the Sun.”
Step #4 Restore yourself and feed your personal growth:
Step #5 Close the Energetic Pathways to Suffering
Now you’re ready to seal and heal the pathways that leave you open to negative emotions and pitiful attitudes.
“All pathways to pity and self-pity are sealed and healed.”
You have replaced the pattern of self-pity with self-care and are now ready to Plant Yourself in the Garden of Sustainable Prosperity!
To avoid the DETERIORATION of the old status quo, you’ll want to take the time to collect what’s dear to you and save yourself future mishaps and conflicts.
If things around you seem to be falling apart – playing Kuan Yin’s Transformation Game is a must!
Copyright © 2017 Rheanni Lightwater. All rights reserved.
Disclaimer: These games should not be considered as a replacement for traditional stress reduction or mental healthcare. The appropriate medical or psychotherapeutic authorities should be consulted for the diagnosis and treatment of any medical or psychological condition.